Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Restless

Restless. I love that word, although it does not infer comfort, nor does it usually assume anything good. We become restless from life, from work, kids, within relationships, and we lay restless at night thinking of the days events (I think I just made myself restless from writing all that ha ha). I think we make ourselves far more restless then needed, the pressures of society drive us there, no matter what faith or religion you believe you will be restless at one time or another. Isn't that why yoga was invented, to make you rest?


Why I love the word restless is because whenever I'm feeling that way I know that there is relief in my near future. I am comfortable being restless because I know I will not stay there, there can be so much hope and relief in restlessness.


There is so much we have no control of, and who doesn't like to be in control just a little? I do! I feel restless and anxious alot because of the lack of control of my circumstances. I can control alot in my physical world, routine, to do lists, even attitudes but the things I desire the most I cannot and that makes me the most restless. What God are you doing? Why God is this happening? 
I even see restlessness in my boys. More so in Jake who is my worrier, non social child, (don't get me wrong he's an amazing little boy he just has certain social preferences). When we're in big groups he gets restless and fidgety and clingy. I know he needs some space, and some relief from the busyness. When I am able to take him into another room, even if it's just to use the potty, I'll get down to his little man level and take him by the hands and pull him onto my lap, I give him a big mommy snuggle and tell him that I love him very much and it's going to be ok and sometimes we just sit there for you know, 3 seconds in silence while he relaxes. These are the times that I feel his little body relax, his eyes focus on me (even if it's only for 5 seconds) and I see my Jacob come back to me. He rests, and many times it seems to get him through the rest of the social gathering. 


He did not get that trait from me at all, I do not get restless from being around my friends. But I have my own issues! And when I do, like today. I run (fast) into the arms of the one who holds my heart. God. Ya he really is the answer to everything. 
"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest" - Matthew 11:28


Life is all about choices and there is no wrong within this choice. It is here where I find relief, where God's grace finds me just as I am, where God restores me again, where he shelters me in his love and gives me rest. I pray to him and tell him all about my restlessness, I read my Bible, if I have time I do a page in a bible study that I never did while I was actually in the study and I get down on my knees and I pray.  There really is something to be said about kneeling and praying. I grew up thinking only nuns did that;) but try it, when you are down on your knees, head bowed, or face turned to Heaven you are instantly humbled, it's like I sit there knowing I am praying to the most powerful one in all the universe, I am humbled at who I am in comparison to his glory, I am in awe and somehow it makes my prayer so much less about me and my plans and more about God's will for me. Not saying you can't pray while you're on the toilet, but there are times that need to be reserved for humbled, quite prayer. 


I strongly believe that we are all restless until we have a relationship with Jesus. Ecclesiastes says God has laid eternity in the hearts of every man. Somewhere within us we know there is something bigger and greater than us, even Oprah knows that (didn't you watch the O finale). 
I think “rest” in God means two things: freedom,  Jesus offers us total freedom from the guilt that our sins ordinarily bring. The biggest source of fear and anxiety in all of human existence — death and the threat of being separated from God for all eternity — are put to rest. So therefore accepting Christ's redemption is the beginning of a relationship of trust with God that will ultimately lead to 
the second type of rest, we can find rest knowing how much God loves us, how he showers us with grace, how he helps us bear our burdens. Trusting our problems to God is such a sweeter life then carrying it ourselves. 


Sometimes I have to find my rest in God more than once a day, I have a good habit of taking what I gave him back:) But I always walk away from resting in the Lord feeling refreshed, knowing there is more of Him and less of me which is such a thing of beauty. If you're feeling restless I hope you can find your rest in the one who is so capable and entirely willing to carry your burdens for you. His love for you is unquenchable.


Here is my new favorite song, and what do ya know, it's called restless! 




3 comments:

dana martin said...

Thanks for posting this song, Tara! Why have I never heard of her before?!
Praying on the toilet...lol...i love how honest you are!
And your Jacob certainly sounds like an introvert, like me! :)

Anonymous said...

beautiful post Tara, it is so easy to become restless and not just take comfort in the fact that God is working in our lives. I love this reminder to rest in God and take the time to pray on our knees, I agree that it totally makes our prayers less about us and more about him, i think it also keeps us from rushing our time with God!
Shawna

Southern Queen of the Crazies said...

I have missed your posts!